Itsy bitsy spider flushed down the toilet...spout

EDIT [24/12/04]: On inspection of other spiders I've since sent to the web-encrusted Pearly Gates, namely this one's wife and brothers. For you see when I eliminate something...I eliminate the whole deal, even the pet aphid of the next door neighbour. But I digress. The point is, I have since then properly identified the spider in question as one of the famed white-tailed spiders. Interesting isn't it...anyway...I decided to be a sheep and follow the example set by fellow bloggers with this whole edit thing (you know who you are). After all imitation is the greatest form of flattery (not to mention a lazy bum's dream come true ;-P). But wow this edit is quite long...soon I might have a topic I deem great enough for a whole new post! Oh the anticipation...

I was reading Yu-Tang's blog about a centipede loose in his room and how he avoided contact out of sympathy...well, no such sympathies from me.

The story goes, I had a bit of a spider scare the other day, but luckily I had some spare tissues lying around so I attacked it, intending to squish it with all my might. But alas, it scrambled forward too quickly and touched my exposed thumb.

In horror, I responded by dropping the damned thing, which went on to scurry all over the place and being the lay oaf that I am, I decided to lunge for it from my seated position. Fortunately I didn't miss it and also managed to avoid knocking myself unconscious on my piano chair! And this time, I did squish it with all my mighty might! The tissue ended up having some brown patches...not sure if that was from the spider or...previous...uses but I wasn't game enough to investigate so down the loo it went...(for those of you who are interested I think it was a wolf spider)

But, as you can see when it comes to insects and arachnids, I have no feelings. Endangered? Swat! Pregnant? Splat! You get the idea...

Well as I was saying, I don't know why I have no regard for the lives of innocent more-than-four-legged critters. Perhaps it's an underlying deep seated fear of insects and their possible venoms and such (by the way people, poisonous equals not venomous! Poisons are ingested, venoms are injected). Or perhaps I'm just a real cold hearted exterminator...but hey that doesn't have such a bad ring to it..."Call me the Exterminator". Hehe...

So yeah...a word of warning I guess, if you have any beloved pet insects then don't try scaring me with them while I'm not paying attention. Chances are it'll only end in heartbreak and tears...and a lot of mess...not to mention I'd have to get new shoes but anyway! That's it for another night of Story Time With Uncle Wayland. Good night!


To be continued...

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.