For Lorne

Hello everyone!

I will soon be off to Lorne, so that will explain my disappearance for the next few days (I'm coming back on Monday). As for my apparent disappearance over the past week or so...I've been watching this Chinese video series. It's quite good, but very time consuming (about 31.5 hours of it in total). In addition I had a stack of DVDs to watch (courtesy of Jingles) so there goes all my time into my almost forgotten TV, and MSN had to be laid to rest...for a while.

Anyway, enjoy the holidays everyone and

MERRY CHRISTMAS!


To be continued...

Itsy bitsy spider flushed down the toilet...spout

EDIT [24/12/04]: On inspection of other spiders I've since sent to the web-encrusted Pearly Gates, namely this one's wife and brothers. For you see when I eliminate something...I eliminate the whole deal, even the pet aphid of the next door neighbour. But I digress. The point is, I have since then properly identified the spider in question as one of the famed white-tailed spiders. Interesting isn't it...anyway...I decided to be a sheep and follow the example set by fellow bloggers with this whole edit thing (you know who you are). After all imitation is the greatest form of flattery (not to mention a lazy bum's dream come true ;-P). But wow this edit is quite long...soon I might have a topic I deem great enough for a whole new post! Oh the anticipation...

I was reading Yu-Tang's blog about a centipede loose in his room and how he avoided contact out of sympathy...well, no such sympathies from me.

The story goes, I had a bit of a spider scare the other day, but luckily I had some spare tissues lying around so I attacked it, intending to squish it with all my might. But alas, it scrambled forward too quickly and touched my exposed thumb.

In horror, I responded by dropping the damned thing, which went on to scurry all over the place and being the lay oaf that I am, I decided to lunge for it from my seated position. Fortunately I didn't miss it and also managed to avoid knocking myself unconscious on my piano chair! And this time, I did squish it with all my mighty might! The tissue ended up having some brown patches...not sure if that was from the spider or...previous...uses but I wasn't game enough to investigate so down the loo it went...(for those of you who are interested I think it was a wolf spider)

But, as you can see when it comes to insects and arachnids, I have no feelings. Endangered? Swat! Pregnant? Splat! You get the idea...

Well as I was saying, I don't know why I have no regard for the lives of innocent more-than-four-legged critters. Perhaps it's an underlying deep seated fear of insects and their possible venoms and such (by the way people, poisonous equals not venomous! Poisons are ingested, venoms are injected). Or perhaps I'm just a real cold hearted exterminator...but hey that doesn't have such a bad ring to it..."Call me the Exterminator". Hehe...

So yeah...a word of warning I guess, if you have any beloved pet insects then don't try scaring me with them while I'm not paying attention. Chances are it'll only end in heartbreak and tears...and a lot of mess...not to mention I'd have to get new shoes but anyway! That's it for another night of Story Time With Uncle Wayland. Good night!


To be continued...

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.

Murphy was an optimist...

Hello all...I promised I would blog today and I couldn't think of anything to blog about so I slapped something together...enjoy!

MURPHY'S LAWS

1. Nothing is as easy as it looks.
2. Everything takes longer than you think.
3. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
4. If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong. Corollary: If there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then.
5. If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
6. If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
7. Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
8. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
9. Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
10. Mother nature is a bitch.
11. It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
12. Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
13. Every solution breeds new problems.

For more of this, go to http://dmawww.epfl.ch/roso.mosaic/dm/murphy.html

Well on the whole I think these laws are very true...even though that may be because we tend not to notice the good things that happen, only the bad things.

Well I've also been reading this short timeline of the universe and sorting out what the heck relativity is all about...it's really interesting1 I heartily recommend it!

Oh, and congratulations to Margaret for guessing the last Quotemania, and also congrats to Saman for no particular reason than that I felt like congratulating him!

To be continued...

Don't worry, I'm wearing my lucky rabbit's head.

The chicken vs. the egg: let the battle begin; loser gets eaten

I've gotten over my extreme rage over blogger.com over losing my post, and have decided that since I have nothing to post about, I will start talking about random bits of deeper thoughts involving life (I dare not call it philosophy because I'm not well enough schooled in it and aren't smart enough really). Feel free to run away while you can people, and for those who are brave/bored enough to read on, make sure you input your thoughts about the topics as they come up...and abuse would not be appreciated but if you must...

Anyway, the first thing that came to mind was the age old question of what came first: the chicken or the egg. Well, the obvious thing to say is who cares because they are equally delicious and succulent and full of proteins...mmm...*muffled sounds of eating*...

Well, first to define some premises. You see, it is hard to define the point at which we start calling a chicken a chicken. Because inside the egg the chicken would already have started the develop. Can we at that stage call it a chicken? Because as you can see it would render the egg obsolete. Well, for the sake of keeping this argument going we'll say that the chicken is defined as being that creature which has already hatched from its shell.

Okay, moving on, the chicken as that known today would have been born of non-chicken parents, and was merely an evolved (that is, mutant) form of its parents. By this argument the egg has to have come first. Being the male chauvinist pig that I am, I will also state that the first chicken hatched was also a male, as males can mate with many females and hence make lots of little chickens to populate the chicken world.

On a side note, evolution sure is an awesome thing isn't it? How such little changes over time could produce such variety and stark differences in the world's organisms...wonder if there ever will be some critter that is both plant and animal...such as a wooden chest like creature that walks on many little legs and which can store your items...returning your clothes washed and ironed...maybe it's time to pull out my Little Mad Scientist play kit...although after happened with that criminal I modified and brought back to life, I don't know if playing around with living things is such a good idea. But that's all the fun of being a mad scientist! Dang...


To be continued...

Stupid blogger

Hm, I just lost this massive post...dammit I don't think I'm gonna bother typing it up again.

Argh, stupid blogger.com...I was quite peeved at this new development...especially since I can't remember what I wrote yesterday...

Anyway, some important things that I have to say this post:

1. Sandra has correctly guessed the last quote and deserves an honourable mention seeing as no one else could get it (come on people, it's not that hard!). I promised her a congratulatory message, so here it is: WELL DONE SANDRA!
2. Also, the first Annual Prize for Voluntarily Commenting on Wayland's Blog's Cool Features has gone to Elizabeth Nguyen (a.k.a. Liz) and oh, her blog is very cool as well! Check it out now (see the sidebar)
3. I seem to have come off blog vacation, and it wasn't really that good a vacation, so who knows I might have to take one again.
4. Hm, I do remember something from the lost post, it involved stabbing (of myself, jokingly of course) I think but I can't remember the other details...damn

Ah well that's all for now. More as I think of them. Sigh. Blogging has become too much of a chore, stop pressuring me to post stuff people! I will when I feel like it!

Signing out.

To be continued...

Here's the new quote as well:

"You're looking at Cucumber boy, as in 'Cool as a'."